The Challenge of Self Love
Loving oneself is the best thing we could ever do for ourselves and for the ones we love the most.
Who would have thought that loving oneself would be such a challenge? For different reasons, so many of us go through life for so long not truly loving ourselves but fooling ourselves into thinking that we do. We do all these external things that make us feel good in the moment, only to go back to feeling all those sad feelings that make us unhappy. We tend to ignore that soft whisper that tells us something is wrong and that things need to change, or that makes us feel unfulfilled and unhappy. We ignore the whisper maybe because are afraid of change, because of comfort, we are comfortable with the way things are and so we do not want to change, whatever the reason is we ignore the whisper and unfortunately go on to live an unfulfilled life.
Journey to Self-Love
- Making the Decision:
Making the decision that yes, things have got to change, yes I want and need more in my life because I deserve it.
One of my favorite scripture is John 10:10
The thief comes only to kill steal and destroy. I have come so that they may have life, and may have it abundantly. I love this scripture because here The Lord is telling us, he came and that we might have a good life.
- Faith:
This is extremely vital so you do not give up, because just like everything, learning to love and care for yourself is a journey and a daily one, it is not something that happens overnight and then that is it, it is a seed you must water daily. Having faith means you will believe you will achieve that which you set out to do and that you can do it. And this is where another of my favorite scripture comes into play.
Phillipians 4:13.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Here the same one who came to give you life and give it to you abundantly is telling you, you can do all things in him that strengthens you.
- Surround Yourself with Positive and Good People
I believe that we do not have to do anything alone and that if we connect ourselves with good people who want what is best for us, we are better off for it. Now I do understand that when we do not love ourselves it is very hard to know who good people are, but you know. Ask yourself who makes you feel good when they are around and even when they are not you still feel good when you think about them. Not the ones who give you that eerie feeling in your stomach that you ignore (the whisper).
- Letting go of the Past (Forgiveness)
Most times we learn how to not love ourselves because of hurt, or hurt from people who should have loved us, and we carry and hold on to that hurt, which manifests into us having behaviors that we end up regretting. And so now, not only do we need to forgive those who have hurt us, but now we must forgive ourselves as well. It is rather funny how we seem to be able to forgive others more than we do ourselves.
- Be Kind to Yourself
Again, something that should just be a habit, but so often not practiced. You see one way we show that we do not truly love ourselves is that we do not show kindness to ourselves. In some ways, we do not show kindness to ourselves and that is we do not say to
- No to others when obviously we should
- We allow others to take advantage of us.
- We do not take care of our minds and bodies
- Acceptance
Stop competing and comparing yourself to others, but accept yourself the way you are, believing in the things that need improvement you will over time.
